Poetry

Unfinding Me

What is the self that is not explored, a half-lived life, unknown, abhorred.
The chastening call of reflection –
I am unknown.  There is
You know what I mean –
You’ve been there too.
Behold the guise behind which lies
The hidden part that seeks its not self.
You are unknown.  Behind my face –
There is me.  I am mixed.
It’s a loathsome hideaway.
Repentance made – there is no God to forgive.
The soul is the self all connected –
To one not me inside of another.
You flee.  I am found.
Dark wing flies to the hidden shore
Of remembrance held, gone not away.
Be not still in your finding.
Long nights of trees and lost beginning.
Where did he hide the newling that was
Not yet?  Don’t ask for it’s not had.
Where is the newling not yet?
Ask around the place she could have
Been made.  How Past.
What strange thing.  The fog uncovered in its
Thinning.  The shadow shape unmisted, ungone.
I find.
You are weird.  You are that I find.  To see
Two ways.  Unbecoming, am.

 

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It Rained

they dripped from my panama sky as their planes droned onward…cotton canopies…nylon nets…strangling…satiny shadows sprouted

from the clouds…they hummed.

tilled earth…humid…rich…cushioned fall…in leathered boots…crunch…broken grass…leaves rent…slap…click…drone…mind…groan…manure

the lost wind swept clear the drop-zone…it has angles…and knives…rent…glide

prayed before he jumped…snatched back upward…god said to stay in the air…don’t fall


i said it…i was that god
get out of my sky!

get back in the plane where you belong, you red, white, and blue bastard
time…fate…
elapse…hate

round whirling in his canvas cloud

bullet’s song went pop….shards of memories…corn harvest…soda…lips parted…motor droned…pink tongue…glisten…downy fuzz at the small of her back…red blotchy earth…it rained

he passed flowers…lady bugs dried from the sun…yellow-green smell of broken stems…unyielding rock…sinew stretched…slipped…snapped…surprised…screamed…bone

burned tortillas…charred flour…shard of flower…on the roof…it was hot inside…the motors droned…not the sky…smoke and burned hair…cotton…plastic

the oil spilled…it was warm between my legs
don’t!
i peed

occipital bone…flesh…lead…hair…corn harvest…lullaby…blue-green coca cola bottle…puppy’s breath…flannel pajamas…dura-matter inside the bullet’s song

i didn’t like the raisins in the pudding…they were all swollen and tasted like a rotten something…or rum

corks floating…the labels are stamped through the burgundy…mine got caught in a whirlpool by the cracked mossy rock…his swam past…riding through the sunblast…gone down the…and fade…